The Love We Think We Deserve… Sort Of (OOTD)

At one point or another, we’ve been able to relate to this song. We’ve loved something or someone so much even though it has never loved us the way we deserved. But, what sort of love do we deserve? Is there even such a thing?



When the movie Perks of Being a Wallflower came out, it made popular the quote, “We accept the love we think we deserve.” Given this, perhaps we can surmise that the love we deserve is closely linked to our ideas of self-worth. This, I think, makes sense. If we respect ourselves and think that we deserve to be loved a certain way, then that it the love that we will seek. If we do not think that we deserve to be loved, we usually get into unhealthy relationships wherein we unconsciously punish ourselves for being unworthy.



There are also times when although we value ourselves and have a healthy sense of self-worth, we still fall for something or someone who do does not reciprocate our feelings. Say, for example, being stuck in a job that you absolutely love, but your efforts are just not appreciated. Or, loving someone so much yet constantly feeling that you are making all of the effort. Yes, I know, in an ideal world, the love you give shouldn’t be measured. It should be unconditional. Yet, let’s face it though. Rarely are we truly altruistic in a relationship. Most of the time, we also want to be loved and feel loved. That is OK. That’s being human.



What do we do then when we get ourselves into such situations? Well, the healthy thing would be to get out it, get away, and find something or someone else that Β or who will love you as much. Doing this, however, is not easy. We, as human beings, are intrinsically hopeful. We cannot help but hope that things will change for the better even though this is not always the case. So, we cling to what we love even though it pains us to do so and everyday, it chips away at the hope that makes us who we are.



The love we think we deserve is not always the one that’s best for us. Love has always been complicated and to be honest, I am as confused as most of you are as to how to deal with it. πŸ™‚

Outfit Details:

  • Pink Beaded Bustier from Topshop
  • Pink Tutu Skirt from Forever 21
  • Belt from SM Accessories
  • Ear Cuff with Rose Detail from Swoon Accessories,
  • Ring borrowed from Rhea
  • Shoes from Jellybean

51 thoughts on “The Love We Think We Deserve… Sort Of (OOTD)

  1. You really look thin with this outfit. I guess relationships is about making each other feel complete and complementing each other so there won’t be a chance to fill that need with someone else.


  2. Wow this love topic is deep! πŸ™‚ But I do agree – find love that we deserve, it’s just fair diba? πŸ™‚
    Sexy outfit! That dress will just be a tunic/blouse for me if I do wear one, hahaha… with matching leggings pa (conservative ako) :p


    1. hahahahahahaha I wore it to work but with a cardigan. Then I removed the cardigan and wore it to a party! haha πŸ˜€


  3. “being stuck in a job that you absolutely love, but your efforts are just not appreciated. ” – ouch that hit me… The difference its not a job though. I eventually grow tired of making an effort. I do agree with you that as humans we also want to be loved and feel loved.

    I like the dress and the ring.. πŸ™‚


  4. This look is so amazing on you, and I also love The Perks of Being a Wallflower, especially that quotation in particular. I think it’s so true that too many amazing people don’t truly think they deserve much love. Thanks for such a thought-provoking post, as always. πŸ™‚


  5. Hi, I really love your outfit, you look gorgeous!. With that being said I really feel so close to what you wrote cause that kind of love happened to me, I thought I was completely in love with someone and that his love makes me feel complete and someday I realized that his love wasnΒ΄t the best for me so with all the pain I have to walk away from him although we love each other so much, but time goes by and the pain went away.
    I really loved to read this article. Thanks!.
    Gime from


  6. I couldn’t agree more with your post πŸ™‚ too many times we demean our own self worth and accept a love that we think we deserve, but in fact we deserve so much more. Good post! and I love your heels, they’re gorgeous!


  7. Great writing as usual. I agree… I used to feel my decisions weren’t the best before because I didn’t believe in myself enough. We have to push ourselves to accept the things they want even if we don’t feel like we have the ability… we can. Never underestimate!


  8. I was playing the song while reading your article. You should do this more often! and you were right though; the way we worth ourselves is the unconscious reflection when we are looking for the significant other. You should read that book “He is just not that into you”. Trust me it will save all of us girls so muchhhh timeeeeeeee from being stuck in something that we think we deserve…. πŸ˜› to say the least, don’t try to find a better person for you cause there will always be a better person along the way, but to find someone that can make a better person out of you ❀ THAT is the love that you deserve.


  9. You look so lovely.. Poised and elegant.. I love the color..
    I totally agree with you..
    And I don’t think I believe in unconditional love.. sometimes its not the best thing for us.. it’s seems a bit demeaning when not reciprocated with the same love..


  10. You look stunning! I think you raised some really interesting points abut love and self worth, definitely thought provoking. Toni xxx


  11. I love your outfit, fresh na fresh and the color is so cool πŸ™‚

    I really got to watch perks of a wallflower sobrang nacurious ako πŸ™‚ hihi

    napahanap tuloy ako sa net ng meaning nito πŸ™‚



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